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Revenge of the ghost in the well (FUN VERSE: FINAL of 3 in the SERIES; it just got scarier)

Jun 25 2008 | Views 211 | Comments (14)

Revenge of the ghost in the well (fun verse: 3 of 3; it just got scarier) text: © Raj Arumugam,... Expand

Revenge of the ghost in the well (fun verse: 3 of 3; it just got scarier)

text: © Raj Arumugam, June 2008; art by Hokusai, Katsushika

….hooo…haaa…heee…ha…

sllloooooshhhh….soooollllsssssshhhhhh….drip..drip..drip..

ah, you are back again and now you want to know

what happened to me after I died

as a result of having my brains pop out of my head

as a result of my hitting rock bottom

and consequently becoming brainless

and so becoming a ghost for eternity

or for as long as there are wells in homes…

Well, welllll, welllllll…I’ll tell you –

but don’t mind the silly guttural noises I make in between:

I wouldn’t be a ghost if I didn’t, would I?

yeeeeeeeeeeeee…yiiii…hiiiiiiiii…eeeeeeee…

Ha, ha – that scared those stupid donkeys of drunks in the streets…

yeeeeeeeeeeeee…yiiii…hiiiiiiiii…eeeeeeee…

woooohoooooo…eeeeee….

and now I’ll tell you the story

of how I had my revenge

on my husband and his new wife

….hooo…haaa…heee…ha…

sllloooooshhhh….soooollllsssssshhhhhh….drip..drip..drip..

within a week after my hitting

the bottom of the well –

Ouch! It still hurts when I talk about it –

my husband took a new wife!

Ah, I watched her as she came to the well

swaying her hips and with the smell of deodorant

and heavy perfumes drifting in the air

looking like a proper tart if ever there was one:

and she’d look at herself in the water

and pucker her lips and flit her eyebrows

as she admired her beauty,

this sixteen-year-old who looked

like the tail end of a pig;

and she came there every morning

and - Oh, how my heart burned

(I don’t have a brain, remember?)

to consider that she was not only in my home

(come on, there were no divorce papers

so the home and the thousand wells still belonged to me!)

and to see her make a mirror of the water in my well

which was now my home in my exile….

but I waited patiently....

….hooo…haaa…heee…ha…

sllloooooshhhh….soooollllsssssshhhhhh….drip..drip..drip..

and then one night when the full moon

was covered by red clouds

she came out with a pail to draw some water

and I entered the water…heeeeheee.heee…

that was a cunning plan

as according to our sacred traditions

I could not enter the house

except if the new wife brought me in…

and bring me in into the house
with me in that pail she did

and once in the house, even as she placed the pail on the floor

I released my devilish woman’s fury:

I entered my husband’s brain which was as small as a pea

and made him utter words to his new wife,

words that were the truest he’d ever spoken:

Oh my previous wife
was the prettiest woman
who ever lived

the sweetest ever –

and you, my wife now

you’re the ugliest foul bitch

who ever went near a well!

….hooo…haaa…heee…ha…

sllloooooshhhh….soooollllsssssshhhhhh….drip..drip..drip..

and his new wife pounced on him

and I entered her head and seized her cotton brain

and made her scream and froth

and gave her savage strength

that frightened that dumb husband of mine;

and she pursued my husband, her husband

with a knife and that coward

mad with fear went running to the well

and the bitch ran after him

and I leaped into my husband’s peanut brain

and made him jump into the well

where his brains were crushed and came out like baby poo;

I pinned him down with the toe-nail of my left foot

(I still him have there, pinned down well under the toe-nail of my left foot)

and that bitch was screaming and in her delirium she jumped into the well

but I threw her out immediately as one throws out disagreeable food:

I mean, come on –

two is company, three is a crowd

and there’s not much room for a second woman in a well! –

and there she fell

on the ground

and that morning when the servants found her,

she was whispering into their ears:

The rabbit is green

and the moon is black…

The sun is watery

and I’m gone looney…

And since then till her death

she lived walking from well to well

until she found one

which was unoccupied – or perhaps evacuated –

does it matter? –

and she threw herself in

and hit rock bottom or struck gold –

does it matter? –

that bitch died that instant

and her cotton brain flew round the town for days;

and I still live here

with my husband still pressed down under my toe-nail…

and you, you who’ve heard this tale of the revenge

of the ghost in the well

you must repeat this tale all your life

or it will not at all go down well
it will not go down well

with me, the ghost in the well…

….hooo…haaa…heee…ha…

sllloooooshhhh….soooollllsssssshhhhhh….drip..drip..drip..

Revenge of the ghost in the well (fun verse: 3 of 3; it just got scarier)

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Comments (14)

Latav posted 2 mnths ago

Funny and interesting..Sweet revenge..and all's well ...Enjoyed reading this series..

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bhavna14 posted 2 mnths ago

whoaaa Raj Sir... tattt wazz diffrntttt... vryyy dffrnttt revengeee....u've quite an imaginationnnn bt honestlyyy,,, me stl laughin coz of Emily heheheheheheh... :))))))

rgds
Bhavna

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anandabairavi posted 2 mnths ago

Raj,
You are chilling my Khoon .A different story.pl visit my blog on billi sooniyam on similar subject.bye
AB

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Raj Arumugam posted 2 mnths ago

Meera
Next you can meet Emily who seems to be making fun of all of us at sulekha!

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meerajay posted 2 mnths ago

Raj Sirrrrrrrrrrrrr
heeeeeeeeeeehooooohuaaaaaaaaaaa my my!!! absolutely wild imagination!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! hehe u got me scared Raj sir!! Loved this series too. hehe was real fun!
Whats next????????//////// hehehe
cheers
ME:))